Do the Main Thing First and Every Time

As I pulled away from a drive-up window yesterday I realized there was no straw in the sack and only one thin napkin.
Not enormous stuff and yet.  And yet, wtf?  If they can't even do the essentials, what else is lurking?
It's a drive-through!  People need straws.  People need napkins.  And what's up with some dumb note taped on the order window that tells me to ask for ketchup if I want it?  Seriously?
Totally, completely unacceptable.  Totally unsatisfactory.  Totally.
Can't even get to "WOW-ing" me if you can't simply do the thing you are advertising that you do.

They Hold Church Every Sunday

I'm getting ready for a Christmas party and anticipating all the extra drinking and eating of sweets that will take place.  This one is my homeowner's association, and I can walk to and from.  Maybe that's going to be my excuse for drinking two glasses of wine instead of one... or none.
My nephew was murdered by a drunk driver 5 years ago.  He was riding his bike home, escorting his girlfriend and daughter after a party.  Somebody leaving a wedding reception plowed into him and killed him instantly by the side of the road that night.
I don't know what that driver lives with every day.  But I know what I feel and I have witnessed what his parents feel.  Someone is dead who should not be dead.
Have a Merry and Sober Christmas season.
Please call a cab when you drink.
Before you leave, watch this video to remind you how easy it is to father a tragedy.
We all already know this, but we need reminding.  Just like church.  They have it every Sunday because even though we all know the story and we know right from wrong, we need reminding and we need to think about how to choose right from wrong regularly.

Don't Settle

Now contrast "number 2" to another company who contrasts Better and Best.  The messaging here is that we can and should discriminate between products.  You are worth it.  Don't settle for some poser, for something that looks as good as what we really want. 
I think that messaging is better.  It is about value, about surrounding yourself with excellence, about rejecting sloppy or simply of lesser quality.
Now to go beyond my product to me.  How much of the time do I settle?  How much of the time do I say this is good enough?  How much real choice making do I do, day in and day out, and select the path and actions that are excellent?  Being excellent is harder, but in the end it actually frees up and focuses me to do what is valuable and important and not spend time checking off activity of little consequence.

Proud to Be # 2?

Most television commercials are background noise, or are sketchy frames as I fast forward through them, but I actually saw a company tonight listing their benefits or features or however you choose to delineate, but I digress. 
I can't believe that this company advertised that they are #2 in Customer Service.
Now that is beyond odd.
I can't get a hold on why that is worth advertising. 
#2?
Wow.
Mediocrity is okay to showcase.
Yikes.
Say it aint so.  Say that "second best" is not something to brag about. 

Business as Usual Means Oblivion

Attracting customers and enlarging the basket of the customers who are attracted is critical stuff.  Those are two really big and really different things.  Our marketing, our mission, our activities revolve around these primaries.
Witness the enormous Thanksgiving day newspaper packed full of enticing ads designed to lure us into the businesses and spend our Christmas funds once again.  How many disappointing experiences though awaited the shopper when we got there because it was business as usual and the reason that we hadn't frequented the establishments since this time last year.
Show me something different (in a good way), show me something better, or show me something cheaper.
Thats' it.
When I get there you must stand out.  There is too much noise, too much competition, for business as usual.  You have to be different, or better, or cheaper than the rest.  (And cheaper isn't any fun, by the way.)
Choose different.  Or choose better.  Then set about doing those things that really are.  Excellence really is about doing things in a certain way.

An Aspirin for the Pain

The Heath brothers, of Made to Stick fame, amaze and delight me.  This article reminds how the customer decides what they need.  It is our job to get to know them, to uncover what their actual needs are so that whatever it is we have to offer is a must-have, not a nice-to-have. 
Think of every time you've made a purchase.  The ones you are happy about are those that fill a need you have defined.  You are mad at yourself when you buy something that you realize you don't really need, you never use, you wish wasn't there to remind you that someone else thought you needed it and you believed them only to realize otherwise later.
Think of every time you couldn't close a sale.  It's because you were pushing something you thought they needed instead of offering something that perfectly fit their own described need.
A word to the wise is sufficient: you've got 2 ears and only 1 mouth.
READ THEM NOW

Idea 30: Turn off the News

Do not under any circumstance let the TV in your lounge/waiting area/lunchroom etc. ever be left on the news.  If you are a retail establishment, the worst thing you can do is let the negative, inane headline, non-consumery stuff on news channels touch your customers while they are in your place of business.
Block those channels.  In fact, block all local channels during election season because those annoying political ads are taking up all the space and that is a very very annoying thing.
Monitor your TVs.  If you see it on the news, immediately change the channel.
Put something funny or pretty up for people to see.
When we are comfortable our defense is down and we can relax and spend money.  Do not agitate us!

Idea 29: This Requires Empathy

Albert Einstein said that you don't really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.  I get that, but it also makes me laugh. 
I constantly run across similar analogies about treating a customer like your mother or grandmother, and I guess it really has a powerful impact on people who don't have an empathy gene.  In other words, yeah, treat motherly and grandmotherly customers like you would your own, with respect and care.  But don't do that with a Generation Y customer, or somebody your own age/sex.  It will seem weird and condescending.
If you can't be a chameleon; i.e., match your customer's intensity and interest, get the hell out of customer service.  You have to read the situation, adjust your tone, terminology, tactics to the situation at hand.  That's what makes you understood and successful. 
Care and/or Service looks different to different people and it is your job to analyze the situation and perform accordingly.

Idea 28: Respect Each Other

Treat your colleagues respectfully. 
There is nothing more uncomfortable to me as a customer than witnessing coworkers yelling at each other or speaking ill of each other.  Plus, it makes me wonder what they do and say when I am not there.
Conversely, the most comforting and impressive experience is witnessing coworkers helping each other, addressing each other courteously, etc. 

Idea 27: Call Me

We recently refinanced our mortgage with a killer-low rate and had a pretty easy time of it and good experience out of it.  Later after all the paperwork was complete we got a nice form letter in the mail thanking us for our business and asking us to tell our friends about them.  That was nice, BUT...
When I get a phone call from a real person from a business thanking me for my business and asking how my new purchase is performing, I really really really am delighted and impressed.
If you want me to talk about how great you are, do the fine details and call me instead of mailing me.  If you are intent on mailing me, a form letter is about the most minimal thing to send so you really oughta save the postage.

What are all these Ideas?

It's really taking me a long time to come up with the things that my favorite supplier could do to be even better.  I started out a month ago (a little more actually) hoping to post one idea a day.  Too hard!  I gonna keep up the rant till I get to 30, but just in case you forgot what I was doing, I wanted to tell you to scroll up and down for all the ideas.  (Obviously the main idea is to find something you can incorporate or at least to read a customer's mind.)
When I get to 30, I'll be back to my irregular blogging about Excellence in general.

Idea 26: Keep it Predictable

I just hate it when I've got a store or a website figured out and they rearrange it on me.  Especially when it doesn't now make sense to me where to find things.  Freshening up is good, but don't change things too drastically.  I love the predictability of where to go to find what I need.  It makes me feel like I'm home, like I belong.  I am comfortable and likely to spend money.  If I am lost, I will leave in frustration.

Idea 25: Use My Name

I've been a Gold member with a car rental agency for 10 or 15 years and really relish the special treatment I get... the one time I didn't use them, the comparison of the other place where I was "saving money", proved to me why I want to pay more sometimes.
One of the details my Gold company does is put my name up on a board.  I just love that!  Can't help it, but the name I most want to see up in lights is mine.  I get to bypass the check-in and go straight to my waiting vehicle.
The speed of that is why I love it... witness long waiting lines in major airports for non-Gold members.  But the icing on that cake is seeing my name on the board.
This is so totally a thing every business that sets appointments can do.  Do they though?  Nope. 
As Pretty Woman would say "big mistake, huge."

Idea 24: Cream

Lose the powdered cream!  Only people who drink their coffee black think that powdered cream is a reasonable offering.  This is the age of designer coffee after all.  The days of the 25 cent cup of coffee are over.  Get with it.  Put out some cream at your coffee bar.

Idea 23: Lighting

My favorite place has great lighting.  It is natural.  It is warm.  They make their environment warm, comfortable, friendly.  If you see yourself in a mirror you look good.
Compare to almost EVERY place you go where they don't even think about it or know what I'm talking about.  Hideous, ugly, old-fashioned, cool-blue fluorescents.  Makes everyone look anemic.  Feels cold.  Feels uncomfortable.
Boo.  Hiss.  To bad, unnatural lighting.

Idea 22: Recommend

Things other people bought that are similar to what I'm looking at, or similar to what I've looked at before, help me complete my purchase and also add to the overall ticket.  Can't help it, recommendations work.

Idea 21: Ability to Respond

So great when whichever "associate" or "clerk" or "rep" or whatever you call your employees can help me front to back.  What I mean is that I don't have to be handed off to a manager, or told to go to another counter for "customer service", or given a blank stare that I know means they don't know the answer to my question.
It is a relief when all employees are responsible because they have been trained and provided the tools and are expected to use their abilities to respond to me, the customer!

Idea 20: Organize

Messy displays and messy work spaces are a huge turn off.  Clean it up and make it easy for me to find what I need.  Don't make me wonder how you get your job done as you shuffle through your papers and boxes.  Messiness: big turn off.

Idea 19: Refer

If you don't have what I want I will probably ask you if you know who does or where else I can try.  Give me a referral.  It's definitely a plus when you can help me in my search.  And I will remember you fondly the next time I'm looking for what I know you have.

Idea 18: Kids Are People Too

Make eye contact with my kids.
Treat them like humans.
Don't just attend to the one spending the money.
My kids are the apples of my eye, and if you notice them and acknowledge them, you have won me too.

Idea 17: Brag a Little

Show me around, literally.
Brag about your facility, your people, your tools, your features, your location, whatever.
Let me see that you are proud of who you are and what you do.

Idea 16: A Good Assumption

Assume I've been here before.
"Welcome back" is a wonderful phrase to hear.

Idea 15: Recognize Me

The sweetest sound to my ear is my own name.  Use it a couple of times when I'm here.
The cherry on top is using it next time I am in because you recognize me!

Idea 14: Make it a "Best Company to Work For"

Everybody is familiar with Fortune 500's annual list of the Best Companies to Work For.  There is fanfare and news stories about who is in the top 100 and top 10 this year.  We hear about the lavish perks and huge paychecks for the employees.
Stop for a moment and consider two things before you become resigned to the fact that you can't compete with Google and Starbuck's.
First of all, those top companies to work for are also top stock picks.  They are profitable.  They are successful.
Second, those creative and lavish perks weren't assigned by a government agency, or invented by a pencil-pushing accountant-type manager.  They are the brainchild of company managers who want to create a great place to work.  They get that if the employees are happy, then their customers are happy, and when their customers are happy, they are spending money and making the company more money.
Start with these ideas and then figure out how to creatively make your company a place that people want to work.
You will find that yes, perks are required, but if you don't have the mindset ahead of that that your customers and your employees' enthusiasm for your company are critical, no perk will keep them around.
It is all about how you value what really is essentially valuable.

Idea 13: Search for Ways

Hearing from a person in a management position is a huge turn on to a customer.
When I have received a phone call or an email from a manager of my favorite company asking for my opinion, or asking how my recent experience was, I love it.  I feel important.  I feel like that company really cares about doing their best.
I feel like what they do is not an accident or it isn't because they somehow hired a star employee.
It is because they try.  They work at it.
And they work at it by starting at the most important place: the customer's perspective.

Idea 12: Let Me in the Club

I love it when I get an inside track about what I'm buying or should be buying. 
My favorite clerk always shows me the new thing that just came in, or the perfect accessory that will make my ensemble complete, or pull something out of the back room that hasn't been put into "regular" inventory yet. 
It makes me feel special.  It makes me feel like she knows me and she cares about me. 
I totally know that this is a sales technique that makes me spend more and I don't care.  It's all about me and how I feel and that favorite clerk is my favorite for that reason.
Find out ways to replicate that and bring your customers into the "Insider's Club."

Idea 11: Stay In Touch

Remind me that I made a great decision to do business with you.
When I leave, make sure you have a plan for staying in touch with me:

• send me an email with valuable information - be sure that I don't perceive it as spam by sending me something dumb
• call me and say something valuable, don't say something dumb
• send me a card on the birth of my major purchase
• don't harrass me, just keep your name on my radar

Idea 10: Reassurance

Reassure me that you are the expert, that you will do the worrying, that you will take care of me.  Your confidence in your ability to do what your sign says you do makes me happy I am spending my money with you.

Idea 9: Make It Comfortable

Airports are made for waiting and they have the worst waiting rooms in the world!
Consider your waiters.
Are there comfortable chairs in your business?
Are there enough for everybody who is waiting?
Are the chairs accessible throughout your facility?
Remember that when I am comfortable, I will spend money.  What do you want me to do at your place of business?

Idea 8: Don't Just Offer

You know how when someone offers you a drink or a snack, you always politely say no?  Sometimes you really want a drink but you say you're okay and don't take it. Maybe you don't know them well, maybe you think you'll feel uncomfortable, maybe you don't want to "put them out."
Well, I ran into a guy who really understood hospitality.  He said "let's get a cup of coffee first" and started escorting me to the coffee pot.  That launched a profitable meeting, for us both.
It's hard to explain how that leveled us out.  How having a treat together greased the wheels.  It just did.
That's a good thing to emulate.
Don't just assume I know where the coffee pot or water fountain are.
Take me there.  Partake with me.  Let's get a cup of coffee first.

Idea 7: Look Like Your Neighborhood

When I go into a business, I want to see what I see all around me, which is men and women, older and younger, a mix of races.
A lack of diversity at a business is troubling.  It raises questions, like why does only one type of employee fit in here?  Where are the older employees?  Where are the women?  Why is everyone the same race?
If I wonder and feel uncomfortable I am less likely to spend money.  And it's not just me.  This has been studied.  It's of vital importance to decision makers (which is almost always women in families.)
A woman does not want to walk into a college men's locker room... really, she doesn't.

Idea 6

Keep your restrooms surgically clean.
When there is no soap, or no towels, or no toilet paper, or a dispenser is broken, or water is splashed on the floor, or trash is overflowing, it makes me think this is just the tip of the iceberg.  What else is not being taken care of?
It's just yucky and I can't look favorably on the rest of your operation.

Idea 5

When you hear somebody in your employ use a term that is really excellent, like instead of saying "yeah", or "yes", or "no problem", they say "absolutely!", talk that up!
Replicate excellence. Ask everyone to follow the new standard.
I heard someone say "ABSOLUTELY" in response to a question, and it was fantastic.  I wanted to be there.  I was confident.  I was impressed.  I admired that.

Idea 4

When you do something really well and it's a differentiator... like carrying a box out to my car for me, make sure you do it EVERY time.  You have set expectations, you have set yourself apart, now make sure that you execute it consistently so I am not disappointed the one day when you decide you can't or won't do it.

Idea 3

I love it when you have a sale, obviously.
Could you tell me how much I'm saving, or what it usually costs?
Love to see it line-itemed out.

Idea 2

Talk to me with words and also with signs.
For longer term events and interactions, keep me informed of what's next, what to expect, when.
For short term, have a conversation with me.
If I need to navigate on my own on your website, make sure there are sign posts and directions all along the way to tell me where I am and how I'm doing.
If I need to navigate your physical space, make sure there are signs and arrows along the way to tell me where I am and how I'm doing.
Don't assume that I know how to navigate your business.  Don't assume it physically, where certain departments are.  Don't assume it philosophically, who does what and who I should be asking.
I am in another country - be the hospitable host.

30 Days of Real Ways to Improve

Seth Godin had a great idea today and I am going to take him up on it.  His thought is that rather than waiting for a muse to inspire your creativity or productivity, seek out the great ideas, train them, and they will become part of your personal SOP.  He recommended picking your favorite company and write a new idea down for 30 days on things they could do to improve their product or service.   Obviously, a slacker company does too many things wrong and I only go there when forced, if at all.  But someplace I love, now finding ideas for them to be even better takes effort.

I'm not going to tell you who my favorite company is.  I don't want you to fixate on a specific business.  All businesses are populated by people therefore they all have some common issues.  So my ideas should sound universal enough to apply to restaurants, tech support lines, online drugstores, and of course auto dealerships.  So, here goes, these are my thoughts on what would make company AAA an even better place:

Idea 1
Tell me (the customer) your name.  Make sure I know and remember your name.  You can wear a name tag.  You can give me your card.  You can say your name to me at least twice.  Make yourself human and you turn the transactional into the relational. Cha-ching!$$$$

Examine for Excellence

I indulged in a matinee the other day to watch a movie that I knew my husband would not, could not, possibly appreciate: Eat, Pray, Love
I sometimes joke that I must've been French in a former life because of my inclination for drama, self-overexamination, and just all around angst.  This flick is the perfect indulgence for such a temperament.
Looking around the auditorium over a sparce weekday crowd, I noted it was also all female.  Yes, other women had the same idea as me.
It was pure indulgence.  I had popcorn for lunch.  I cried my eyes out and didn't even care if other movie goers knew it.
So, I digress.  This does have something to do with excellence... and this is it:
The unexamined life is not worth living.  Socrates said this first when he was on trial for heresy and wouldn't fight for a life sentence versus the death penalty.  My take on it is that people who examine their lives, who think about where they’ve been, how they got here, and where they’re going, are the happiest people.  Happier people are able to be more productive, make more money, be more successful at what they want to do.
What made me cry most while watching the movie was seeing the regret of letting time pass and not be who she wanted to be.  When she set out to make the time to examine, to learn, to experience, she could then set about being and doing what was really valuable for her. 
That's excellence.  Stop the merry-go-round.  Think about where you are.  Think about where you want to be and where you want to go.  That time out of not going round and round, that time to breathe, is vital to being excellent and to reducing regrets.  And reducing regrets, reduces the tears.

Make a Courteous Left Turn

I don't consider Wichita a big city.  But I've never seen something in town that I've just recently noticed during my expanse of time on rural highways.  And my friends in smaller towns tell me this is just the way it is... it's not new.
I'm driving down a 2-lane road behind a large truck, I think it had recently harvested grain in the back.  His left turn signal and brake lights came on so I began to slow. 
Here's the neat part: he pulled into the other lane, for oncoming traffic, and continued to slow and then turn.  (Don't panic.  We are in Kansas where most highways are very flat and very straight so you can see quite a ways and tell no traffic is coming up.)
It was so courteous, and really so sensible. 
Why should we both slow way down for his left turn if only one really needs to?  Well, when it's analyzed by a law enforcement type, that guy was breaking the law by crossing into the oncoming traffic lane.  On the other hand, even a law enforcement type isn't going to create a fuss unless an actual accident occurs.
Sometimes, the right thing to do is not the "by the books" way.  And I love that. 
I love somebody who is so thoughtful of his co-drivers that he would think of this and break the law.  That is an action I would love to see replicated.  That is the kind of person I want to buy a beer.  That is the kind of person I want to surround myself with. 
I hope that kind of person doesn't only reside in rural Kansas.  I'm a proud Kansan, and would love to take credit that we are all just that way here.  But I know better.  We are not.  But we can aspire to be that way.  And we can.  Really.  Be.  That.  Way.

Do It

Act Differently Until the Different Starts to Feel Normal

Customers Are in Charge

For the past 13 years, Netflix has been distributing DVDs to its subscribers.  They remade the home movie viewing business and have just about pushed Blockbuster and all its ilk right out of the business.  In 2008, Netflix began offering streaming videos to subscribers on a limited number of movies.  And so now the customers are remaking the business again.  Even though it isn't available on all movies (yet) the streaming service is being used by over 61% of subscribers.  And this jump really just happened, by doubling, in the last 6 months.  Netflix didn't go out and market this service, or change pricing, or do anything to drive this behavior.  But customers like it and are doing it and are forcing Netflix into having to adjust their business model.  Here are the stats.
That's the way it should be.  But boy does it make you sit up and pay attention.  You are not in control.  Your customer really, really, is.

Where I Spend My Time

I realized one day as I was moving down the road, literally, that I was not present.  Be Here Now is a mantra my boss used to preach but I thought it had to do with the meeting or workshop we were currently engaged in.
But Be Here Now popped into my head as I was driving and I realized how I wasn't.  I was thinking about my next stop, about what I needed to do when I got home, about who I needed to call, blah, blah, blah.  The thing is, to put it bluntly, if I had died right then, I would've been there... somewhere in the Kansas countryside.  I didn't like thinking that my head wasn't there.  I wasn't being there. And it's really sad to think of how much time I spend thinking about the next thing, and the due dates, and the to-do lists, and even what I should've done or said.
So I stopped thinking ahead and behind right then and realized how blue the sky was.  How wonderful air conditioning in my car on a summer day feels.  How much I like singing along with that song.  How much I like seeing so much in every direction... the beautiful expanse of green prairie.
It was kind of weird too because somehow I felt lighter or younger or something.  I decided to start really being here now, even if, and especially if, behind the wheel is where I feel like I hafta be most of these days.

Count to 3

Someone said with pride "we treat everyone the same".
Really?
WOW!  That is so not the way to be successful.
The hardest thing in the world is what we do everyday, which is reading our situation and responding effectively.  That takes listening... a lot.  It takes asking those questions that we know we should ask, but then really hearing what is being said in response and then formulating our next questions and responses and actions based on what is really actually happening right then.
Why do most people complain about a sales situation, or some sort of service experience?  They weren't heard!  They were treated in a "factory" way.  The same as everybody else.
I'm working on turning off my "reaction-ing", by listening to the answers.  It's like counting to 3 before responding.  Trying not to formulate my next sentence until I've heard everything that a person has said.  If I slow down a bit, there is a better chance that I will hear and respond to what IS, instead of what I expect.

Perfection

If you don't make mistakes, you're not working on hard enough problems.

Not My Department?

Customer Service is not a department... it is an attitude.

PMA

Before you can be, you have to think that you are.

Where Would You Go?

A client asked me a powerful question the other day and I have been obsessing ever since.
He said: "Who has the best service department... where do you go?"
Do you know what stood out to me, what was compelling enough about any of 25 different places?
ENERGY

• A place that wanted me there.
• The people have something behind their eyes.
• The people who work there want to be there.

And since then, since realizing who is best, where I go, I've fired a few providers... not automotive service providers, but restaurants, retail stores, even web sites.  I've fired places that suck the energy out of me.  I've fired places that infect me with their bad energy.

I am so done giving my money to businesses that don't incubate excellence.  If the employees there don't want to be there, for whatever reason, neither do I.  If the business doesn't care if I am there or not, then neither do I. 

Chivalry: part 2

I forgot to mention one thing about the Chivalry and the carrying of the cases: the staff do that for everybody, not just women, not just small men, EVERYBODY gets the personal valet service.

Chivalry Is Not Dead

My husband and I drink different brands of beer.  I like an import in glass bottles and he throws down one of the least expensive canned variety.  He actually went down from one brand to another over price.  But, I digress.
Our division of domestic labor is that I stock the groceries, and he stocks the beer.  We keep each other's favorites and requirements on hand.
But one day I was driving past a really junky looking liquor store with a sign advertising my brand at a really low price.  So I swerved in, determined to take advantage of what was obviously a typo.
What I found was staff who were friendly, who actually made me let them carry my purchase from the cooler to the counter and out to my vehicle.  They were smiling.  They looked me in the eye.
And now, I've been there 3 other times and bought not only my beer, but my husband's, and some other items that we might need someday if we mix up some Italian Margaritas or Captain's Lemonade or some after-dinner coffee drinks.
I've taken over the beer-stocking chore for our household because I love going into this place.  They love seeing me and they make spending my money EASY & FUN.
They have great prices to snag you in.  But read me carefully.  That got me in.  What kept me in and gets me back over and over is the SERVICE.  There is plenty of staff on hand and they actually help you.  They stand out in a good way.  Price is not their differentiator.  Personal service is.

What's Helpful

I subscribe to a lot of newsletters, follow a few blogs, just in general read a lot of tips and taunts to keep in touch and in tune.  I got an e-zine the other day and just thought, "seriously?"
The thing was that I do like getting a positive dose of thought.  I like motivational stuff.  I want to be positive.  I want to be successful.  I figure I've got enough negative, limiting, self-conscious thoughts rattling around in my head, I oughta feed myself with positive stuff as much as I can.
But then this came along and went on for what seemed ages about why I shouldn't watch TV.  I just totally lost it.  And, I unsubscribed.  I mean, really.  The topic, the tone, the length.  It was all too much.
Being too good.  Being too much in control is not what I am about.
I totally don't need that pedantic tone.  I'm really just trying to maintain, trying to try.  Plus, if I wanna watch TV... (and I really wanna watch TV, I am an unaplogetic TV fan) then I will watch.
Don't scold and try to make me feel guilty.  I gotta have some entertainment.  I gotta have some escape.  I gotta get off the treadmill and not feel bad about it.
I don't want to be known as "pinch-mouth".  That was the nickname that my sisters and I gave to one of my aunts.  You totally get the picture, right?  Always serious, always disapproving, always angry about something.  The one that you were afraid of but also wanted to taunt and irritate because it was so easy.
There's plenty of stuff around that is not scolding, but is helpful.  That's what I'm supposed to be too.  What I'm trying to do here is reach for my best, encourage you to reach for your best, and all of us have fun doing that.
So comment, encourage, retweet, forward, and especially scold me when I'm out of line.  Participate with me: let's be excellent or at least aim in that direction.

Try Not Having a Job

I am a volunteer.

You are a volunteer.

There isn't any place that you are that you are forced to be.

If you have a job, you volunteered to take it, to meet the set expectations, to simply be there.

Anybody who repeatedly complains about their situation is rather crazy.  You are in the situation you are in by your own volition.  If you don't like it, change it.

Try not having a job.  Literally.  Maybe you will like it better.  Maybe you will be more successful by not having "a job".  Or maybe you will see that you aren't cut out for self-employment, for entrepreneurship.  If not, then go back to working for someone else.  But stop complaining.  There is practically no situation where you have a valid reason to complain, and complain, and complain.  It's just no way to live your life.  Loving what you do, and doing what you love is not just a platitude.  It is really the way to live this short, short life.

Why I Won't Go There Anymore

Boo hoo. My favorite boutique is now in the steaming heap of businesses I avoid.

Love, love, love the product there.
Love, love, love the personal attention.
Hate, hate, hate the politics of the shopowner.
So, politics never enters my mind when choosing where to do business.  I really don't care about people's politics. But when I am in the dressing room and the clerks are rabidly defaming some political situation, it makes me uncomfortable.
I made one slight remark to get them off the topic and back on to me. But the next time I went in it was just more of the same and now I won't go back in there. I am not looking for political repartee when I am shopping for clothes!
Unless you are running a politically based business, a large percentage of your customers don't want to hear political, especially angry political, banter while they are there. 
Think about where you are, about what can be heard and ask yourself if it is making the environment more comfortable for the visitors.  Ask yourself if you are making it easier for people to spend money.  If you can't confidently say YES, then shut up.  Stop doing whatever it is.  START doing something that makes it easier for people to spend money!

Nobody's Home

Have you ever been talking to someone and you look in their eyes and "nobody's home"?
Wow!  What a feeling... and it is not good.
I am amazed and dismayed that a company where I do business is hiring people to interface with the public and NOBODY'S HOME there.
You've read my rants before about my trials and tribulations with the grocery baggers.  So, okay, I had yet another bad experience at the grocery store.  No surprise.  These guys are vying for a space in the annals of really bad service organizations right next to airlines.
I just can't believe that a company figures that a grocery bagger is only worth, I don't know, minimum wage?  Whatever.  But that face to your customers is YOU.  So, tell me, is it worth hiring merely someone who walks upright?  Seriously?
When I ask the guy to not put EVERY single can I bought today in the same bag and he doesn't know what I mean... is that who you want to be the face of your company?  Come on!

The Difference Between Relentless & Consistent

Look at these word pairings and detect the difference:

RELENTLESS consistent

AMAZED impressed 
POSITIVE satisfactory

PERSNICKETY choosy 
UNSWERVING dependable

SECURE                 comfortable

See how each pair can be found in a list of its own synonyms... but the first is MORE, it is PASSIONATE, it is NOTEWORTHY, it is WORTH STRIVING FOR.

It's also a tiebreaker... it is the reason I will choose you over somebody else who supposedly does the same thing as you.

I will ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS choose to spend my money at places where there is passion, where I feel secure, where the experience is just BETTER.

I Must've Done Something Good

A friend on my facebook page had gotten 20 out of 20 questions correct about the Sound of Music and I couldn't resist but try my hand. Of course, I got 20 of 20... I'm a movie fan, I'm a singer, I've thrown outdoor Sound of Music sing-along nights in my backyard.
Then I felt a little embarassed. Not because I got them right but because I wanted more questions. Or a timer to see if I did it faster than she did. Did she know the words to my favorite song in the movie (I Must've Done Something Good)? Had she ever participated in a stage version herself?
It's a silly competition maybe. It's a weird and outdated bit of trivia to be expert at.
But it is fun. It is fun to compare myself to others with similar interests.
How often do I use this competition to really push myself to an edge that matters, I am wondering now. That's really where that energy pays off. Where I want it to pay off. If I compete with others, with myself, not to stay at my current state, but to be better, much better, that's where it pays off.

How Much Do I Own?

I had a horrible meeting with someone. He was a total a**.

I had something to accomplish, but he continually and loudly resisted, was defensive, hurled obstacles. I couldn't get what I wanted done. I kept thinking. I kept trying different approaches, different explanations, a different posture. I couldn't make any headway. I tried. I really tried.

Hmmmm. It must be him. He must really be an a**.

I had several names on the tip of my tongue and they didn't have stars in them as I said them to myself. They didn't have stars in them as I shouted them in my car.

You think texting is distracting while you are driving. Try imagining that you are cursing and physically assaulting a person while you're driving. It probably is in the same bucket as texting.

But time and space took over and started winning my attention more and more.

Maybe he is an a**. But what am I? What could I have done or said differently? What WILL I say and do differently next time?

That is the eternal question I must ask myself. Because I regularly deal with a**es. And a lot of the time I am an a**. But I have work to do and I have things to accomplish. If everybody really is an a**, then I must learn how to prevail, or exist, but hopefully collaborate. That much I own.

Status Quo

Someday in the future I will look back on the early 2000s and reminisce how I survived it, how I lived through what seemed at the time the most tumultuous, blah, blah, blah.

Surely your parents or grandparents have done this in front of you much to your eye rolling. That's because it's part of what we do as we age.

We sometimes just sit around and wish we knew the thing today that we should be investing in, focusing on, and avoiding. Because, like Seth Godin says, "the status quo is leaving the building, and quickly... every revolution destroys the average middle first and most savagely."

The guy in The Graduate was right; "I have one word for you: plastics." But he was actually a joke that the viewers at the time laughed at.

So what is the one word, or two words, or more today? Pay attention. The signs and the advice is out there. The worst thing to do is cling to the irrelevant past or to think that good enough is good enough. What you do and think and how you do it are changing every day. Do not become irrelevant. Do not resist. Grab on and realize that principles remain, but your methods have got to constantly change or be demolished.

Feedback is Critical

I've said it before that feedback is a gift. When someone provides you feedback, good or bad, you must say thank you. Your mom was right about saying thank you... even if it wasn't what you expected or wanted. AND, especially if it IS what you expected or wanted. It is very easy, it is common, not to care enough to tell you "that was good" or "that was not so good", so when someone invests the effort and care to do so, it is a gift to you.

Now that we've established feedback as a gift, take a look at the American Idol auditions. omg. There are hundreds, I suppose thousands, of people who desperately need to hear the feedback and not only say "thank you", but take appropriate action (like just shut up.)

Check out these odd specimens who come in there spouting their certainty that they are the next American Idol, yet when they sing it is absolutely awful. The judges say no (in various tactful and tactless ways, but still no). But here's the puzzlement: the person starts singing another song, and then maybe another and another. Maybe the bouncers that the producers hired for the day have to drag them out kicking and "singing". eek. Totally unbelievable.

I kinda get it... it sounds different in your head than outside it. That's why many of us don't like to hear/see ourselves on tape. All the more reason to crave and respond to what those outside your head say.

And yet, when you get bad feedback about your performance and you find fault with the giver, and/or you continue to do exactly as you've done, you are that ridiculous American Idol contestant wanna be.

Transactional vs. Relational Shoppers

I was annoyed by a number of television advertisements this weekend and started comparing the number of ads I watched that were annoying, versus those that were compelling or mildly entertaining. I also jotted down which of them were companies with whom I did business.
Not a surprise to me, but I bet to the people spending the money to barrage me. Where I spend the most money more times a year are businesses with whom I have a relationship with. They are the ones striving to have a relationship with me. They are smart enough to realize that they make more money and see me more often if I trust them and/or if I am comfortable with them. And this is true for online as well as the in-person places. I'm not transactional most of the time. I am sometimes. Sometimes, the price of the product is how I make my decision. That is when I know the item is disposable or has little impact on my life. So... apparently many of those annoying advertisements are from businesses who consider their product disposable or of low impact. At least they are to me. My money goes elsewhere.

Be Selfish: Avoid Your Own Heartburn

Poor me; my laptop is on the fritz and I have intrusted it to a repair shop. My stress exists on several levels here, but the repair shop personnel are on the top level today. After stating my frustration at not being kept informed about the status of the repair/non-repair, the fellow who answered the phone let loose on me about how well he does his job and how he was certain that I had been told and how all he ever gets is answering machines and how the boss is out of town, blah, blah, blah.
As I obsessed about the situation later, I realized that the guy did not "win" any ground. Sure, my laptop is held hostage; he will get my money and I will get my laptop back someday.
But on a personal level (his) he did nothing but elevate his own blood pressure, heartburn, stress, etc. I feel sure when he hung up the phone he re-told the story with plenty of embellishment to his peers. I thought how stupid it was of him to get angry with me. He is losing in customer interactions on a daily basis, most likely multiple times every day.
I realized how great it feels to give great service. And thought, even if a customer is a turd, when I can turn the frown around, when I can resolve the problem, when I can reassure about a positive outcome, not only the customer, but I feel great. And to me, that really is a good enough reason to do a great job, to give great customer service.
Goodbye Rolaids.